Take It Easy on China

There are a lot of reasons to be down on China. They have an abysmal human rights record. They totally screwed over Tibet. Their food leaves you hungry again in an hour.

However, the presentation and handling of the Olympic Games is not one of these reasons—in fact, the Chinese should be congratulated for putting on the most entertaining Olympic Opening Ceremony of all time. Yet numerous articles are appearing on my radar, directing “gotcha!” after “gotcha!” at the Chinese over the truly remarkable show:

*The firework footprints across Beijing leading to the Olympic Stadium were not real, but CGI. SCANDAL!

*The cute little China girl who sang a song didn’t actually sing at all. OUTRAGEOUS!

*China directed all their performers to smile at all times, even if they weren’t feeling totally happy at that moment. THAT’S IT, I WANT MY MONEY BACK!

Let’s start with the famed firework footprints, perhaps the worst source of media outrage since Don Imus used the word “nappy.” As I was watching the footprints at home on NBC, I knew they were computer generated.

How did I know? Am I psychic? Am I a pyrotechnic expert who can see even the tiniest flaw in firework detail? Do I have a man on the inside who gave me a heads-up warning? No (but man, wouldn’t it be sweet if the answer to any of those was yes?)

The reason I knew the fireworks were fake was the commentators said, in plain English, that the fireworks were fake. They described it as a cinematic element, and all one had to do was look closely to notice that the footprints were indeed digitally crafted fakes.

So what happens when China uses fake footprints that they have admitted are fakes before the show even airs? Outrage!

Forget the fact that the fireworks outside the stadium were there for real (as reported here and shown here) and only replaced with fake ones on television due to fear of not being able to properly capture the display on film. Forget the fact that we were told from the get-go that these were computer images. Forget the fact that nowhere in Olympic, television, or fireworks tradition does it state that it is taboo to use CGI. The Western media jumped on this sucker, using it as just another demonstration on how controlling and untrustworthy those sneaky Chinese are.

Maybe it’s because I’m from the computer generation, but using computer graphics (especially when you tell the world that they are computer graphics) doesn’t seem like that punishable of a sin to me, regardless of what the graphics were meant to represent. If China had inserted a cartoon into the ceremony in the same way Hollywood does with its animated characters at the Academy Awards, would the English speakers still be outraged by this trickery and yell “Witch! Witch!”?

It bothers me when the Western media looks this stupid, because in the global community the reputation for stupidity translates to the people the media represents. I just know that right now there is a Chinese citizen reading an article with the “gotcha!” approach over the footprints, laughing to himself. I wonder if he is wondering if these stupid Americans and Brits realize that when the name of the swimmer and their country appears on their lane of the pool in Olympic swimming contests that it is not being projected there for real but is, *GASP*, a computer graphic! And to make it even worse, we were never even told specifically that the world record line was a graphic—how dare the Chinese make it appear as though they have the power to project a solid moving line that humans can somehow transport through across the pool? They’re trying to pull one over on us!

The fake singing girl is a different issue, and while less defendable than the footprints, we are still dealing with a major overreaction. First, it’s important to note that the Chinese outed themselves on this one, and would never have been caught if the director didn’t just freely admit it was lip-synched by someone else. We live in a culture where I assume every performance is lip-synched (remember Ashley Simpson’s weird ho-down on SNL?) and I will continue to assume this until Britney Spears sings “Ave Maria” a cappella and her voice sounds EXACTLY like it usually does when she sings. Numerous American singers have their voices tweaked and modified by the magic of computer technology, so for us to have a holier-than-thou take on the issue is a little bit ridiculous.

China did indeed pull a bit of a Milli Vanilli, but it was in the context of a unique show. Had this been a concert and had the Chinese then went on to market the fake singer and sell CDs with her name on them than yes, I’d be outraged too. However, this was a performance, and not all the cards have to be put on the table before you do a show. Audrey Hepburn didn’t sing in My Fair Lady because it was a performance, and nowhere do I remember being specifically warned that the voice that belonged to the lovely Eliza Doolittle was actually coming out of someone who was obviously less lovely, otherwise she’d be cast in the lead. This is just what people do, and to hold the Chinese to a higher standard than we hold ourselves is laughable, not to mention freakishly hypocritical.

So blame the Chinese for all the numerous things they should be held accountable for, but lay off the Olympics. The Chinese are serving as wonderful hosts, and just because you don’t like the way your host keeps their house doesn’t give you the right to spit on their floor, especially after they’ve served you a delicious meal that was the amazing Opening Ceremony. The only problem is I think I’m going to be hungry again in about an hour…